You Get What You Ask For
Last week, I promised to write whatever the first 21 people told me to write. I ended up getting 32 topic suggestions, and I’ve decided to tackle all of them. I may not go in order and I might add a few Unrequested Posts from time to time (with the first Unrequested Post coming tomorrow). But for the next 32 or so days, I’ll be writing on the following topics that you all requested. If this all goes well, I’ll do a Reader Request series again in the future.
Here’s what we have on tap for the next 32+ days.
By Reader Request
- Reader participation post: wife wants to carry a child by surrogacy, but her husband says “over my dead body”
- How to tell if a marriage is broken and it’s time to call it quits
- Alisa’s suggested reading list for a good marriage.
- The qualities make a bad relationship salvageable
- What I wish I had known before I got married. What advice would I give to my pre-married self?
- Why care-giving sucks
- Alisa’s Nether Grooming Guide
- Arranged marriages: pros and cons
- How to get a errant spouse to fall back in love with you
- A primer on tone of voice
- Reader participation post: Man struggles with whether to tell his buddy that his friend is dating an abusive woman
- Reader participation post: She’s a morning person; he’s a night person, she’s clean; he’s messy; she’s social, he’s a wall-flower. Can they find common ground?
- What to do about a procrastinating spouse (ie “I’ll do that tomorrow”)
- Reader participation post: Husband ignores wife’s requests, but jumps right on it when someone else asks the same thing
- Can you work together and stay in love?
- Sex addiction
- The Buddhist approach to the in-laws
- Reader participation post: One spouse is a flirt. The other is jealous. What to do?
- Alisa’s premarital workshop (Note: you all didn’t really request this one, but I was inspired by the next post and thought it might be a good idea)
- How to tell if he’s marriage material
- Reader participation post: He’s controlling. She has no backbone. What should she do?
- Alisa’s Bad Marriage Stay Motivated Guide
- Reader participation post: He’s always late. She’s always on time.
- Stress and marriage—how to stay connected through tough times
- Reader participation post: She’s caught him in numerous lies. Now the couple is trying to build trust. She’s struggling. What to do?
- How to tell your man, “I think it’s time for Viagra”
- How to tell if you are in an abusive relationship and when to get out
- What to do when your values conflict
- What to do when you are the only one trying to save the marriage
- All About Passive Aggression
- How the Buddha Would Raise a Child
- All about second marriages
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May 9th, 2010 at 8:45 pm
I am so looking forward to most, if not all, of these, because most, if not all, pertain to to me/my husband. Could I add one for some time in the future??? — What to do if your husband (spouse) loves/show affection/attention to the children more than you? He actually said to me “Between work and the children, I have nothing left”
I had to just walk away.
May 9th, 2010 at 9:16 pm
I completely agree Melissa, while I only requested one of these topics almost every single one has one way or another to do with our marriage, (still a little to young to worry about #26 lol). I am very excited about this next month and I’m hoping to learn a lot that will help me grow in my marriage…..or finally realize there’s nothing more I can do.
May 10th, 2010 at 3:04 am
This sounds terrific! I have two words: can’t wait! I’m so excited and looking forward to all of this, I’m sure I’ll learn a lot!
Many Blessings,
-Sarah Liz
May 10th, 2010 at 6:57 am
Lots of good reading in perspective! …
May 10th, 2010 at 7:50 am
looking forward to it!!
May 10th, 2010 at 8:13 am
Sounds GREAT!! Will love to see number 6
May 10th, 2010 at 8:29 am
Sounds great Alisa! Can’t wait!!
May 10th, 2010 at 8:42 am
wow impressive list!
a few of these really hit home, ouch.
May 10th, 2010 at 9:00 am
I am looking forward to these topics also. Even though some may be a little late for me, they will come in handy in the future.
May 10th, 2010 at 9:31 am
I am really looking forward to these posts! Many of the topics make me wonder, does she KNOW us???
Every once in a while I will mention something you post to my husband and he will take interest. Slowly I hope to get him to read your blog with me, it’s terrific.
May 10th, 2010 at 10:30 am
Kate; That’s what I did and Ray looks forward to doing the daily blog with me and coming up with his own comments. We have had some interesting debates about a few of the issues and comments but it has opened up dialogues and opportunities for communication. He is cringing about topic # 13 (He is such a procrastinator) and he definitely wants to discuss #16, ( He thinks I’m addicted)very old school, I can’t even get him comfortable with looking at eden fantasy yet.
from Ray- Baby steps, sweetie, baby steps. Maybe I’ll look at it with you tomorrow.
May 10th, 2010 at 1:11 pm
I’ll admit it…I’ve been a little behind on my P:HEA reading. I’m sad to read this and realize that I didn’t even know about the solicitation. I would have certainly been one of the first 21 had I known about it. Oh well, I guess!
Alisa, I think this is a GREAT idea! I’m looking forward to it.
May 10th, 2010 at 4:43 pm
I really thought I needed to work on #13 but figured I could wait until tomorrow lol
Just kidding. Actually a great one & is SO me 
May 10th, 2010 at 8:44 pm
cannot wait for a more than a few of those (particularly 29 and 31) ::wishes time would go faster::
May 11th, 2010 at 8:52 am
I’m in! This is going to be so interesting – I can’t wait to see what you have to say, Alisa.
The Writer’s [Inner] Journey´s last blog ..The 5-Question [Literary] Agent Interview: Elise Capron
May 11th, 2010 at 4:06 pm
The nether grooming guide is the one I can’t wait for!! That should be fun… I like how you are implementing Peter Shankman’s ideas from the keynote to ask people how they like to receive their information and what they want to know more about.
May 19th, 2010 at 7:35 pm
i love all your news letters especially the one on jealousy…. i never knew what the real meaning was until i read it and i have to say a light came on… this is assailant to what my wife is……. see we are separated right now for 3 months now and i want her back, cause in my heart i really love her…….and i think she loves me … we have been married for 11 years. and things started to go back 4 years ago …even in the bad times i still love her and try to figure out what went wrong…. but after reading that letter on jealousy i couldn’t believe what i was reading, it was right on to what my wife was or is… my question is should i sent her that email to her…. we are having very little communication and contract right now
July 6th, 2010 at 12:59 am
I’m glad I’m not so far behind that all 32 are done, but I still have quite a bit of catching up to do…