The Story of Alisa, Part 5

by Alisa Bowman on August 25, 2009

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21 Lessons I’ve Learned From Blogging

During my first year of blogging, I learned many things about writing, blogging, and life. In no particular order, they are as follows:

  • If you make fun of yourself, people will laugh and feel a kinship with you. If you make fun of others, people might laugh, but that will come at the cost of losing your friends and becoming the least loved person in your family.
  • Sometimes all the inspiration in the world can’t turn a thought into something that’s worth publishing. The process of trying to turn it into something worthy of publishing isn’t a waste, though. All writing – even bad writing – is a practice and a warmup for better writing.
  • The topics that I almost don’t write (no one wants to know about this, this is going to offend some people, I can’t believe I’m willing to talk about this) usually end up being my most popular posts. This might be true for your writing, too.
  • Have the courage to be controversial. Strong convictions, points of view and voice are what make one blog stand out from the millions of other blogs on the Internet.
  • To write with a strong voice, you need to do two things. First, have the courage to be you. Second, read your writing out loud. That’s the only way you can hear whether or not your voice is truly in your writing. I read every blog out loud before I post it. It not only helps me to Voice It Up, but it also helps me to catch typos.
  • There are people whose have made it their goal in life to make other bloggers feel sad. Ignore these people. Their anger says a lot more about them than it says about you and your writing. If your writing attracts trolls? You are doing something right. You are Troll Worthy.
  • Occasionally you will accidentally offend people with your writing. Even if no normal person would have ever misunderstood your point, it’s better to apologize in the comments area or write a formal blog apology.
  • In every post, make it your goal to lift people up and help them improve their lives. Do not spread ill will. Although that tactic does work for a few, it doesn’t work for most, and it’s bad for your Karma.
  • Every post should accomplish a goal: to help, to teach, to inspire, to entertain, to provide comic relief, and so on. If the post serves no purpose? It’s probably not worth posting.
  • There are many ways to promote your blog and find readers. The three tactics that have worked best for me: guest blogging, writing controversial list posts for social media promotions, and publicity. Most bloggers forget about the third. Getting quoted on a news site or high profile blog can bring you thousands of visitors in a day.
  • You can overcome a fear of public speaking, especially if you are passionate about what you are talking about. Speaking about what you blog about is another powerful way to promote your blog—and get paid in the process.
  • Writing in your own voice can induce a state of bliss that is more powerful than any street drug or trust fund—even if you never earn money for this writing.
  • When you first start blogging, you’ll hear many stories about people who monetized their blogs quickly. The went from zero visitors to a million in one year and no income to 6 figures in the same amount of time. These people are exceptions to the rule. If you try to reach the same goals in the same amount of time, you’ll end up in a mental health hospital. In reality, it takes the rest of us a long time to earn money for this type of writing.
  • Don’t get attached to having a certain number of web visitors, comments or subscribers. As long as these numbers are consistently growing—even if just by a little bit—you are doing something right.
  • Whenever you are feeling down about your traffic or comments, say something about feeling down in your Facebook status update. Your Facebook friends will make you feel loved and appreciated again.
  • Sometimes no one will comment on a blog post and it will make you feel like no one is reading. That’s not necessarily the case. It might mean that no one feels comfortable leaving a comment about that topic.
  • Store all of the nice emails your readers send to you in a folder. Read them whenever you feel like quitting.
  • Never stop learning. You can always get better.
  • It’s really okay to talk about your sex life and other intimate details, as long as you are sharing these details for a reason. It makes other people feel normal about their intimate details.
  • Connect with other bloggers. When you feel unloved and alone, they will come to your rescue.
  • Help others with your writing. It gives you a life purpose, which generates a wealth of inner peace and happiness.

{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Deena August 25, 2009 at 7:04 am

Thanks Alisa! I’m just starting out with my new blog, but your unfaltering honesty has given me the courage to move forward with mine. I will try to keep all of these lessons in mind as I move forward. Thank you so much for the inspiration.

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Sarah Liz August 25, 2009 at 7:25 pm

All I can is THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! I am printing this out and putting it up on my wall! You are the best! Have a great day!

Many Blessings,
-Sarah Liz :)

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Almost Slowfood August 26, 2009 at 9:19 am

Wow!! I’ve been blogging for just under four months and these lessons are incredible! Just what I needed to feel reinvigorated. Thank you!

PS – I’m printing them out too:)

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David Portney, Public Speaking Training Wizard August 26, 2009 at 11:13 am

Hey Alisa, I’m glad to see you mention doing public speaking about something you’re passionate about because many people don’t realize that there are tons of local organizations & associations that badly need a speaker to come in to speak. This is a great way to “get your feet wet” if you’re a speaking newbie too. Speaking opportunities are wide-open out there and you’re doing those orgs a huge favor by showing up to talk about what you love for 20 minutes.

Hope that helps!

Best,
David Portney

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Melissa Cassera August 26, 2009 at 8:18 pm

Thank you this is great! I just started blogging as well and I find my new rule is ‘if I hesitate before posting, it’s going to be good.’ It’s so therapeutic to open up about things you were embarrassed about before, and helps people feel they’re not alone. Thanks for being such an inspiration!!

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Linda September 2, 2009 at 7:25 pm

Thank you, Alisa, for the encouragement to be controversial. I usually am not afraid to speak my mind and, boy, do I walk on eggshells to word things just right and to be diplomatic. When I’ve clicked on submit and my work is on the site for the world to see, some regret sets in regarding content. I read it over and over before commiting it to the page, but it still feels like I’ve given TMI or betrayed a relationship once the writing has reached it’s destination.
You’re insightful about writing giving your life a purpose. I write poetry too. It has made me feel worth something on my own. Every compliment helps me to realize that its a gift. The poetry has become an outlet for my emotions. If you were to read them, they would take you to the place I was in my life, emotionally, at the time of the writing. I am so grateful for that!
Nava Atlas’s blog, “Literary Ladies”, is also a great place to receive advice about writing. The more input you can gather, the more rounded-out the learning.

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Beau Korsmeyer May 2, 2010 at 11:38 am

Hello! Just thought I’d respond. I honestly enjoyed this blog. Keep up the outstanding work.

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Trish Cardona May 16, 2010 at 10:28 pm

Wow, what an inspiration! Sometimes, I find it unbelievable that people who write so well could have started from zero reader except for their family. It is discouraging when you hear stories like how I got from 0-1million in 6 weeks or something! I’ve been blogging for nearly a year now, and I still haven’t had the regular time to do it, nor the readership to show for it.
But. I. Will. Get. There.
Blessings and many, many thanks.
.-= Trish Cardona´s last blog ..Seven Simple & Sexy Stressbusting Strategies =-.

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Jane September 18, 2010 at 10:24 am

Just came across your blog and found this post inspiring. I love the part about being real and discussing intimate details. Our society is often so close and secretive, leading to a lot of loneliness. I also find the things I think people will care least about, they care most about!
Jane´s last [type] ..new stuff and old pipes

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Susan Evans January 13, 2011 at 5:43 pm

What a wonderful post. Wow. I love your idea of printing out the good e-mails I get about my blogging, and read those when I feel down. And yes, I do have a state of bliss as I’ve found my own voice. I forgot how much fun it is to write!
Susan Evans´s last [type] ..Free Online Bible Resources

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Stacy May 23, 2011 at 2:54 pm

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!

I came across your blog and website because I’m a writer also and I googled your name b/c you wrote an article in Parents magazine that I admired. I wanted to read more about your writing and see if your website contained writing advice to beginning writers – what I found was so much more! Wow, love your blog, love your site, love what you are doing! I admire you and love your advice on staying true to your voice on your blog and in your writing. I write a blog also, and there are some days I wonder if anyone is reading b/c I don’t receive many comments or I feel like giving up b/c it is so much work and the ROI is questionable….but I keep going b/c I love it. The timing of my finding your site is impeccable. Thanks for the advice!
Stacy
Stacy´s last [type] ..Why I refuse to deprive myself

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Rebecca May 29, 2011 at 9:57 pm

I’m looking forward to reading more of your blog.

Just an editing note, the sixth bullet reads, “There are people whose have make it their goal in life to make other bloggers feel sad..”
I think you were going for, “There are people WHO have MADE it their goal in life…”
Rebecca´s last [type] ..Drifting- drifting

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Alisa May 31, 2011 at 5:13 am

Hi Rebecca– Welcome and thanks for pointing that out. I’ve fixed it.

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Karlee August 17, 2011 at 6:06 pm

I stumbled upon your blog while searching for relationship blogs, more specifically someone that is writing about the same thing/something similar to what I’m blogging about. I can’t stop reading! You are truly an inspiration. I really enjoy your blog. It makes me happy to learn of your successes.

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