1. Are we really going to….
2. First of all…
3. I already told you …
4. What is WRONG with you?
5. You always do this!
6. Why do you always have to be so…?
7. Why can’t you ever be more….?
8. You’re such a ….
9. No offense but….
10. You’re not going to like what I have to say, but…
11. Oh, so it’s like that, is it?
12. That does it!
13. I tried not to say anything about this, but…
14. Oh just lighten the [insert expletive here] up already.
15. There you go again.
16. It’s just like you to…
17. You would be like that, wouldn’t you?
What phrases put you on the defense in your marriage and other relationships? What phrases do you use that tend to put other people on the defense? Are there any phrases here that you don’t agree will lead to a fight? Why? Which of the above phrases really set you off? Why is that? Do some of these phrases work as long as the tone of voice is in check? What do you think?
LISTEN IN TONIGHT: I’ll be on Woman Talk Live in Baltimore WCBM 680 am Saturday night from 6:07 to 7 pm. You can listen live here.
TUNE IN TUESDAY: I’ll be chatting with Philadelphians live this Tuesday afternoon around 4 as part of the ABC Action News segment about dating and sexting.
A professional journalist, Alisa Bowman is the author of Project: Happily Ever After, a memoir of how she saved her marriage, and coauthor of Pitch Perfect, a must-read if you've ever had a sense of dread tie up your insides before a speech, presentation, or conversation. If you enjoyed this post, you will no doubt love her updates on Facebook and Twitter.