9 Ways I’m a Normal Mom and Wife

I used to walk around feeling like a terrible mom and a terrible wife. I thought that no one else on the planet felt the way I did about marriage and about parenting. The reason I thought that is because of this: we humans tend to hide our insecurities. On the outside, we try to look happy when we are sad, competent when we feel incompetent, and effective when we feel anything but.

It wasn’t until I started talking about my insecurities that I realized so many other people had them, too. There are billions of us walking about feeling like bad parents and bad spouses.

Recently a bunch of writer friends and I started emailing each other about our biggest parenting flubs. You know what? We all had them. You can read about some of them here, on Jennifer Margulis’s Mothering.com blog.

It got me thinking. Instead of calling these things “bad,” let’s call them what they are: normal. We all screw up from time to time. We all wish we were better parents and spouses. (If there is a single person reading this who feels completely on top of it all—who is the perfect role model for the rest of us to follow—please leave a comment).

Here are 9 ways I’m a normal mom and wife:

1.     I often think my husband hates me, wants a divorce and is having an affair when, in reality, he’s just grumpy and needs to go to bed. I never seem to learn this lesson.

2.     This morning I needed to give my daughter lunch money because I never did get around to signing her up for the fancy smansy swipe card program—and I never did get around to making her lunch, either. We were running late, so I just told her to buy her lunch at school with good old-fashioned money. I went into my purse to get said money and realized I only had a $20. I thought about asking her to go hungry. Just for a second. I really did. Then I gave her the $20.

3.     My daughter was dragging her feet while we were walking to school last week. I couldn’t stand it anymore so I put my palm on her back and pushed her forward to speed her up. She tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and fell on her face.

4.     I don’t remember the last time I cooked dinner.

5.     My daughter has not had a shower in 6 or 7 days. Do not tell any of her classmates.

6.     Two weeks ago I noticed a huge cobweb growing within the piano. It’s still there.

7.     My husband was in a bike race Saturday. It took me 48 hours to remember to ask him how he did.

8.     My daughter asked me to read her an extra book at bedtime. I refused because it was a Berenstain Bear book, and those books are long. She cried. I walked out of the room. When I remembered to check on her again, she was asleep. I can’t believe how cold hearted I can be when I’m tired.

9.     On Saturday, I took my daughter out for breakfast because it had been about two weeks since I’d been to the grocery store and there seriously was not a crumb to be found in the kitchen. She ordered a blue frizzy soda and I didn’t even blink an eye. In fact, it just occurred to me as I was writing this entry that I let her have sugar for breakfast that day.

What are your normal parent and spouse moments? Leave a comment.

Note: I’ll be on BlogTalkRadio this Wednesday talking about this sort of thing. Join us. Details here: http://ht.ly/2CFO3