Saying the same thing with more volume isn’t going to make my husband understand it.
Saying the same thing 100 more times isn’t going to make my husband get it.
If I address issues when they are just nagging nuisances, I’ll be able to solve them and move on long before too much resentment and anger sets in.
Usually when people lash out and say something nasty, they are not necessarily trying to make me or someone else feel like crap. Rather, they are trying to feel less crappy about themselves.
Sometimes when people refuse to apologize, it’s not because they think they are right. It’s because they are worried that they might be wrong, and they are too weak and scared to face this realization.
If I use difficult people as a way to grow and practice my skills (assertiveness, compassion, forgiveness, communication skills, patience, etc), life becomes more fun and more bearable.
Many of the things that Eastern philosophers and gurus recommend for achieving happiness (releasing the sense of self, releasing the urge to control, etc) at first seem impossible. Then, once I try them, I wonder why I ever thought they would be difficult to learn or master.
If 100 people see the same event, 100 people will see a different event. We all interpret their world through our own memories, filters and realities.
Parenting a toddler is scarily similar to training a dog. The only difference is that crate training a toddler will get you an visit from a social worker.
Few people truly outgrow the terrible twos. They just have fewer temper tantrums and try not to have them in the middle of the grocery store.
Love 9 & 10! I often think my niece & nephew (both toddlers) are more work than my dogs! And I know I’ve had my fair share of temper tantrums as an adult, but I do try to have them in private ….most of the time.
Something I have learned over the last 29 years, and something that I keep having to remind myself of is that things don’t often go exactly as planned. The best you can do is have hope for how things will go and try to be prepared for whatever may come.
I have really enjoyed all these Alisa. Here are a few more I learned.
1) It can take years of positive comments to build somebody up. It can take only a min of nasty comments to destroy all those years of work.
2) When I point my finger at somebody else there are three more pointing back at me.
3) Treat your spouse & family with the same respect we would show to absolute strangers. (how often do we see somebody be kind to strangers, say nothing but nice things to them, then say horrible things about & to their husband/wife?)
4) If we don’t make our spouse feel better about them selves, if we don’t build them up, if we don’t make them feel appreciated for the many things they do, somebody else sure will.
5)Random acts of kindness not only make others feel better about themselves, it makes us feel better about ourselves.
6) If our entire world is built around me, me, me then our entire world will eventually consist only of me, me, me because nobody else want to be around you, you, you
There is my nuggets of wisdom for the day…lol I have really enjoyed these Alisa. You have added quite a few to my list as well. Have I ever told you that YOU ROCK!!
1) Your wife already thinks you are full of hot air. Farting only reinforces that thought
2) Don’t forget your anniversery. The couch really does make your back sore when you sleep on it for a week.
3) Not in the mood for sex? Talking about how great your last lover was really will solve that problem for YEARS to come…..lol
4) Grandchildren are GREAT opportunities for revenge for the hell your daughter/son put you through in their teen years. Offer to take the rugrat for the weekend so your adult child can enjoy a romantic getaway weekend with their spouse. Make sure the child is old enough to speak & throw really good tantrums. While they are with you, cater to their every whim, let them eat Oreo’s for breakfast, reset their internal clock for 1am bed time, teach them to say embarising things while in public. At the end of the weekend tell your adult child what a wonderful time you had with the grandchild & send them home to deal with their new creation.
4a) You may want to turn your phone off & move so your child can’t call you at 1am or leave the kid with you to deal with the problem you created……LOL
1. It is better to ask a dumb question than to fix a stupid mistake.
2. Praise your children every day, build them up, when they are young this is where they get their courage from.
3. Don’t judge, we are all on our own journey and what is right for me may not work at all for you.
4. We ARE our brother’s keeper, even if it is just with kind words or a shoulder we are here to help each other. Society really started its downward spiral when we put such credence in the phrase “Look out for #1″.
As a frequent culprit of #4… yep, usually when I’m a total bitch, it’s because I’m feeling all discombubulated on the inside. Misery loves company, right?
#1 nor will it make your kid (speaking from experience).
#4 must ponder. Maybe that explains why my husband says such mean crap to me.
#8 so very true.
#9 also very true. I swear I got my dog thru those trying months by telling her “I survived a teenager, I’ll survived you”. At which point she mouthed “whatever” and walked away.
#10 is that’s what’s wrong with most people – they are still throwing tantrums they are just harder to recognize since they aren’t laying on the floor?
OK, my early morning, already vacuumed the house and listened to hubby bitch about the cats sleeping on the clean clothes (cat fur all over his socks) smart arse remark to #6 – If I use difficult people as target practice….
Joanne, love your #2.
Drummer Guy, is that why my daughter isn’t giving me grandchildren – she knows the revenge is going to be hell?
Hey guys i want to share with you a way i make $500 daily and i only spend 5 minuites doing it a day! I strongly suggest you check their website out as there is really a brilliant video that explains everything you need to know. Check them out at DOMINATE MOBILE MARKETING
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you for all of these, Alisa but I especially like #9 and #10 – so very true and they made me laugh out loud. I needed that!
Love 9 & 10! I often think my niece & nephew (both toddlers) are more work than my dogs!
And I know I’ve had my fair share of temper tantrums as an adult, but I do try to have them in private ….most of the time.
Something I have learned over the last 29 years, and something that I keep having to remind myself of is that things don’t often go exactly as planned. The best you can do is have hope for how things will go and try to be prepared for whatever may come.
I have really enjoyed all these Alisa. Here are a few more I learned.
1) It can take years of positive comments to build somebody up. It can take only a min of nasty comments to destroy all those years of work.
2) When I point my finger at somebody else there are three more pointing back at me.
3) Treat your spouse & family with the same respect we would show to absolute strangers. (how often do we see somebody be kind to strangers, say nothing but nice things to them, then say horrible things about & to their husband/wife?)
4) If we don’t make our spouse feel better about them selves, if we don’t build them up, if we don’t make them feel appreciated for the many things they do, somebody else sure will.
5)Random acts of kindness not only make others feel better about themselves, it makes us feel better about ourselves.
6) If our entire world is built around me, me, me then our entire world will eventually consist only of me, me, me because nobody else want to be around you, you, you
There is my nuggets of wisdom for the day…lol I have really enjoyed these Alisa. You have added quite a few to my list as well. Have I ever told you that YOU ROCK!!
Ron
Here are a few more I learned.
1) Your wife already thinks you are full of hot air. Farting only reinforces that thought
2) Don’t forget your anniversery. The couch really does make your back sore when you sleep on it for a week.
3) Not in the mood for sex? Talking about how great your last lover was really will solve that problem for YEARS to come…..lol
4) Grandchildren are GREAT opportunities for revenge for the hell your daughter/son put you through in their teen years. Offer to take the rugrat for the weekend so your adult child can enjoy a romantic getaway weekend with their spouse. Make sure the child is old enough to speak & throw really good tantrums. While they are with you, cater to their every whim, let them eat Oreo’s for breakfast, reset their internal clock for 1am bed time, teach them to say embarising things while in public. At the end of the weekend tell your adult child what a wonderful time you had with the grandchild & send them home to deal with their new creation.
4a) You may want to turn your phone off & move so your child can’t call you at 1am or leave the kid with you to deal with the problem you created……LOL
I crack me up
Ron
Love the list;
1. It is better to ask a dumb question than to fix a stupid mistake.
2. Praise your children every day, build them up, when they are young this is where they get their courage from.
3. Don’t judge, we are all on our own journey and what is right for me may not work at all for you.
4. We ARE our brother’s keeper, even if it is just with kind words or a shoulder we are here to help each other. Society really started its downward spiral when we put such credence in the phrase “Look out for #1″.
LOVE #1 & 2 – I keep trying though!
Andi´s last [type] ..What’s your WORD
Loving #9 and 10.
As a frequent culprit of #4… yep, usually when I’m a total bitch, it’s because I’m feeling all discombubulated on the inside. Misery loves company, right?
Great lists so far!
#1 nor will it make your kid (speaking from experience).
#4 must ponder. Maybe that explains why my husband says such mean crap to me.
#8 so very true.
#9 also very true. I swear I got my dog thru those trying months by telling her “I survived a teenager, I’ll survived you”. At which point she mouthed “whatever” and walked away.
#10 is that’s what’s wrong with most people – they are still throwing tantrums they are just harder to recognize since they aren’t laying on the floor?
OK, my early morning, already vacuumed the house and listened to hubby bitch about the cats sleeping on the clean clothes (cat fur all over his socks) smart arse remark to #6 – If I use difficult people as target practice….
Joanne, love your #2.
Drummer Guy, is that why my daughter isn’t giving me grandchildren – she knows the revenge is going to be hell?
LOL Kathy. Could be
Another good list Alisa – would be good to have all 40 plus selected contributors ones posted as one complete list at the end!
Hey guys i want to share with you a way i make $500 daily and i only spend 5 minuites doing it a day! I strongly suggest you check their website out as there is really a brilliant video that explains everything you need to know. Check them out at DOMINATE MOBILE MARKETING