Marriage Improvement Monday
This is almost a guest post from Mr. Project Happily Ever After. I’m still writing it, but the entire post was his idea. I asked him what I should tell you all to do for Marriage Improvement Monday and he said, “Do something nice for your spouse.”
“Hum, that might work,” I said. “But I think I might have already written that post.”
Readers? Have I?
He pressed on, “It doesn’t have to be a huge favor. It could be something small. Like you could go to the beer store and get him a case of beer. Or you could wash the stinky dog. Or you could vacuum the carpet. Or you could go take the clothes out of the washer and put them in the drier.”
To completely understand the significance of all of that, you need to understand a few things. In our house:
- He drinks beer. I hardly drink at all.
- Even though the dog is really mine (it was my idea to adopt him, I trained him, the dog prefers me and would probably guard me to his death), it has somehow, in recent years, become my husband’s job to wash him. And our dog is quite stinky. In fact, we often don’t call him by his real name. He lifts his head to the name, “Stinky!”
- My husband does all the vacuuming because I can’t stand the smell or sound of the vacuum, and dirt on the carpet doesn’t bother me all that much.
- My husband does the laundry, mostly because he’s quite persnickety about how it ought to be done. But I do put the clothes away, mostly because I’m the only person who knows where they go.
That’s why those are all examples of nice little favors that I could do for him. Were I to do any of those small tasks, he would definitely notice. I wouldn’t even have to announce them by saying things like, “Hey have you smelled the dog lately?” or “Wow do you think the carpet looks different today?” I wouldn’t even have to pull one of those, “Honey, I’m in the mood for a beer. Could you get me one? What, there isn’t any left? Are you sure? I thought I saw one way, way, way in the back, behind the milk.”
No, I wouldn’t have to hint that I’d like an atta girl. He’d give it to me because those small favors would make him enormously happy.
I found it quite interesting that my husband didn’t think to mention sex as an example of a favor that one could do for one’s spouse. I suppose that’s because he knew I’d be writing about whatever he suggested. Either that or he takes sex for granted. What do you think?
Anyway, my husband has already done me a nice favor by helping me figure out what to write for Marriage Improvement Monday. I suppose I should reward him for that by bringing him a beer and then heading to the laundry room. Or do you think he would prefer to a blow job? I’m not sure. He didn’t mention it as part of his list, so I assume not.
Still, should he be reading this post and have a desire to do yet another nice thing for his woman, he might:
- Fix the cabinet door in the kitchen that has been off its hinges for the past 6 months.
- Clean the bathroom. The toilet is getting fuzzy and I’ve been too busy blogging to deal with it.
- Make a miniature version of Neptune for our kid’s science project.
- Go to the grocery store. One word: potatoes.
What will you do to put a smile on your spouse’s face today? What small spousal favors would make your day?
Copyright 2010 Project Happily Ever After
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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Well, last night I DIDN’T drink the last of the Coke even though I really wanted some caffeine, as I knew he’d want a rum and Coke when he got home. I reckon that counts!
.-= Frugal Kiwi´s last blog ..Svelte Felt Sphinx Minx =-.
My Hubby would so want me to take the BJ route. Which is fine. In fact, if I tease him with hopes of one, he’ll actually get things done around the house and that makes me happy, which then makes me want to take the BJ route. He would probably appreciate it if I vacuumed the van. It takes a lot less work to make me happy. If he sweeps the porch without me asking. Actually, it’s all “without me asking”. Asking kind of takes the “just because” out of it. He could clean the fridge, do the floors, take the kids away for the afternoon, make the bed, clean the bathroom(s), rub my legs or feet after a hard day…yeah, any one of those would make me smile. When I’m happy, I’m usually horny. So, it works out well for both of us. I figure the day he gets down and cleans the fridge he either wants something really “special” or he did something really bad, lol. Maybe one day he’ll make the bed.
I packed my husband a bag and told him to spend the night at his parents place.
It’s not how it sounds!
We have little kids and he is the one who gets up to them on the early mornings and feeds them breakfast. It’s not like I don’t try to get up to them, it’s just that while I’m still lying their willing my arms and legs to move and get my out of bed he gets up first. And he’s exhausted.
I figured if he wasn’t home I’d have to get up (or the kids could wait until I’m ready haha). He declined my offer, decided an early night in his own bed would be best. But I think I may have to get up to them. Praying for an 8 or 9am wake up call, instead of the 5:30 we got today lol
Zarna–you let me know when you get that 8 or 9 am wake up. I’m still waiting! The latest mine wakes is 7:30 am and I’ve come to see that as luxurious sleeping in.
.-= Alisa Bowman´s last blog ..How to Get Along with an Introverted Spouse =-.
I suppose since I have to work my regular job then go to a clients, I’ll stop and get his favorite fish and chips for his lunch tomorrow since he is always making my lunch. His shoulders have been really hurting because of the heavy lifting at his work so I’ll give him a message also. That should take care of my doing for him on Marriage Monday. Of course I could also go the blow job route too, if he doesn’t fall asleep with the message.
It does sound like alot of our husbands could get extra lucky if they just play their cards right though.
Yesterday I washed 7 pairs of pants – the ones he wears to work, so he wouldn’t have to go to work nekked today. I also packed his lunch last night for today. And I was up to make sure he didn’t forget it, as he sometimes does.
Before I read this, I was thinking I should give him a massage. On Saturday we picked up about 1200 pounds of flagstone for my zen patio. He was very helpful to me. I’d picked up 350 pounds last Monday and figured it would be so much nicer if we shared the job. But of course, he did most of the lifting. This morning he mentioned that his muscles are sore from his “work out”.
I will make all the phone calls today that are needed to be placed. (i.e. oil changes for the car, contact real estate agent about another house showing, etc.) He has a phone phobia about talking to people on the phone that he doesn’t know.
On my way home from my doctor’s appointment today I had thought about stopping at Starbucks to get him his favorite coffee…but then it slipped my mind. I may have to “sneak out” of the house later today to get him a coffee and tell him that I need to run some girl errands.
Uh-oh. I didn’t do one nice thing for my husband today. In fact, the day started by his wanting to look up the TV schedule because there were supposedly history programs all day for the holiday, and I waltzed in and burst his balloon, stating in no uncertain terms that we needed to clean out the Studio, ie. he needed to clean out the Studio, because that’s where he sleeps in the summer. He sighed and got to it. Took all day. Well, then I cooked him dinner, so I guess that will have to count as my one nice thing.
Alexandra–I think that still counts as a nice thing, as he will thank you later now that it’s done.
.-= Alisa Bowman´s last blog ..How to Get Along with an Introverted Spouse =-.
This post cracks me up. My husband is making me sandwiches for the plane trip tomorrow because whenever I leave bed our baby (5-months-old) starts to scream and she is NOT interested in Daddy comfort at this moment even though I explained to her that I need to write down phone numbers in case of phone failure and make food so I can breastfeed her en route without passing out from low blood sugar (or toxic poisoning if I purchase a buy-on-board, bleech). She didn’t care. So James gets an A+ in the spouse department and I get to write comments and catch up on reading your always-fantastic (not sure there should be a hyphen there) blog!
Gary paints miniatures for money, so the other day, he was up against a deadline and I didn’t have anything doing and I volunteered to paint all the bases. Saved him 2 hours of work, client loved the work and we got some side by side time together – which is a good time for conversation.
Another thing that is a nice surprise is telling him to go do his thing. I can be clingy and I enjoy a great deal of time around him, but we’re unemployed and home together all day and that’s too much for him. So casually saying “Oh no, sweetie, you just do whatever you like today. I’ve got things under control here” makes him feel great.
.-= Newlywed & Unemployed´s last blog ..Husband Hump Day: Babysitting a Nine Year Old =-.
Love this post! And what is fun about it is it’s different for everyone. Part of being in a marriage is knowing exactly those things that would have a huge impact but which are relatively easy to do, and do them.
.-= Andi´s last blog ..French Friday – French by Heart =-.
I am looking for great treats to put in my WONDERFUL boyfriends lunch box.
You se the guys at work pick on him cuase I pack his lunch. I want special surprises to put in there to make it all worth it.
Searching for ideas I came across this post. Thanks for some great ideas ladies.
Lori
At the time of this post, I believe it was planning a visit to see my husband in combination with being available to discuss that visit that brought a smile to his face. It’s a bit of a challenge to do favors states apart, but there will be plenty of time for all that when he relocates.
Understand that.
We currently are states away as well.
<3 Him….
It is a challenge that we are working through VERY WELL.