Should she grow her hair just for him?
Tuesday, January 19th, 2010
A reader participation post
This question came in from a reader:
My husband likes my hair long. I like it short. Last June I went from a mid-back length to a layered shoulder-length style. The new haircut made me feel pretty and cute. I had it trimmed in August and again just before Thanksgiving. The last trim was shorter, and I felt cuter and prettier than ever. I would even go so far as to say “super cute,” especially with a little barrette on the side. But my husband hates the haircut. He says he loved my long hair and that I don’t listen to his opinion and that I’m out to hurt him by cutting my hair. Recently he wrote me a letter, bringing up our first shower in which he washed my long tresses. I responded that I would try to find a way to grow it a little longer, wanting desperately to come to a compromise, and feeling quite moved by his effort to write the letter. The thought of doing so makes me very sad, though. I love my new haircut and I love feeling cute and pretty. The fact that he constantly brings it up doesn’t help, and when I say, my short hair makes me happy, he just replies, “but I liked it long,” and that response makes me want to scream and/or cry. I wish he would just say, “It’s just hair. I want you to feel happy and pretty above all,” and then drop it.
Surely this has never happened to another married woman on the planet. I would be interested to know what you and your readers think I should do. This seems to be the only conflict we can’t work out.
– Not Happy as Goldilocks
Readers: I’m at a loss. I’ve had short hair. I’ve had long hair. My husband has loved both. I’ve suggested my husband keep his hair short, because I think he looks more handsome that way. But were he to grow a middle aged man’s pony tail, I would still love him anyway. So I don’t think I can commiserate at all with the husband here. How about you? Do you have advice for Not Happy as Goldilocks? Leave a comment.
