1. Your spouse arrives home two hours late. You are not mad or relieved. Rather, you are disappointed. You’d hoped he or she wouldn’t come home at all.
2. You fantasize about discovering your spouse cheating. That way you won’t feel guilty about asking for a divorce.
3. You are having an emotional affair with a member of the opposite sex.
4. You gripe about your spouse to a member of the opposite sex, who gripes about his/her spouse to you.
5. You don’t remember the last time you had sex, and you’d like to keep it that way.
6. If you won a free vacation for two to Fiji, you’d take your mother with you instead of your spouse.
7. You stay up late at night watching Judge Judy reruns so your spouse will definitely be asleep by the time you crawl into bed.
8. You have to drink two glasses of wine before you can bring yourself to small talk with your spouse.
9. If you won the lottery, you’re not sure whether or not you would tell your spouse. You might just take the money and run.
10. You can’t remember why you got married. You suspect you might have been brain washed.
A professional journalist, Alisa Bowman is the author of Project: Happily Ever After, a memoir of how she saved her marriage, and coauthor of Pitch Perfect, a must-read if you've ever had a sense of dread tie up your insides before a speech, presentation, or conversation. If you enjoyed this post, you will no doubt love her updates on Facebook and Twitter.