Comments on: 13 reasons to believe in a bad marriage

By: Richard

Richard — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 11:27:11 +0000

I can see some of these things in my marriage now and I’m beginning to be very unhappy. This is my 2nd marriage, so beginning to wonder if it’s me that’s at fault or maybe I just have a habit of finding selfish women who care only about what they want and what their friends/family wants. I feel like in this marriage, I have given my wife just about everything she’s wanted.. a marriage, a house, a house in the small town where she always wanted to live in, and within the last 6 months, a baby. I help out around the house a lot, not to say I do everything because she is the cook, often the cleaner, and she takes care of all the finances (but mostly because she’s a control freak and prefers to do it all). I’ve also landed a better job. But I feel like it’s just not enough. I can feel this marriage slipping away, but probably not ending in divorce because she’s afraid of the status of being divorced to her family. So instead it’s going to be a long road of loneliness for me, while she talks bad about the things I do to her family and friends but keeps the facade going to me that things are fine. We’ve only been at this a little over 2 years for marriage, but have been together about 5. I’m beginning to think I made another wrong mistake marrying her. At the end of the day I’m just someone who helps pay this bills with my job, and helps take care of our baby.. what a role for a loving husband right?

By: John Duku

John Duku — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 16:14:33 +0000

I like this great peace.

By: Marissa

Marissa — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 02:51:23 +0000

ouch – doesn’t matter -

your tale sounds rough. I hope for you that there is a future of happiness.

I feel sad that you think women “lure a man to the altar using sex” on the flip side of that think of the men that have only gone to the altar because they expected sex.

marriage is a lot more than sex, sex follows trust and compassion and understanding….

By: Doesn't Matter

Doesn't Matter — Sun, 25 Sep 2011 17:22:03 +0000

What a joke, especially your comment about the husband making sport out of not doing chore because ‘he’s not going to get laid anyways’. good enough reason for many people, men and women to find solace and care in another relationship.

Many a woman has lead a man to the altar using sex, and shut things down after the wedding.

I’m in the process of leaving a marriage where my wife was always too tired to make love, but can sit on facebook for 8 hours at a time. I am only needed for special occasions where she needs a date. Her children treat me like dirt and her family has many health issues because they can’t eat in moderation or control their bad habits, like smoking and drinking. the woman I married is not even a shadow of herself, she is a bitter, obese witch. a far cry fromn the woman who tenderly proposed to me on her birthday not so long ago.

I can’t wait to get out of this marriage and this house and will never look back or contact her again afterwards. Glad you marriage issues worked out.

By: kathleen pyeatt

kathleen pyeatt — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 21:23:09 +0000

I am a college mom working on a bachelor degree and nearly finish. I began my college career part-time in 2000 and till this day i have not graduated. we have been together for over seventeen years and our marriage is up and down, nothing has changed in terms of finance. we both likes to spend money and now have nothing to show for due to the recessions. we argues just about everything including: money, laundry, cleaning toilet which he detested, dirty under wears on the floors. being that, I have suffered a severe depressions from ptsd which causes many frictions with my husband and children for many years. I have seek help from my extended family but they rejected me. I also beg my husband to take the children and leave me alone but they won’t go. I don’t have sexual relationship with my husband because i am always irritated with him. I did everything i can to hold our family together but still i am not a happy person. Why? help what should I do?

By: Jhing Santos

Jhing Santos — Mon, 09 May 2011 18:50:33 +0000

until now I can’t believe that I have a bad marriage. This made me realize that I really have a Bad one. Honestly, It cant sink into my mind & heart. Its really hurting me so much. . This made me cry. a lot.

By: S

Sat, 07 May 2011 02:30:59 +0000

Just what I needed to read right now.

By: Miserable Down South

Miserable Down South — Fri, 01 Apr 2011 18:40:47 +0000

I am the exact opposite of some women here…I have a job and have been working to support my spouse and our 2 children while he has been out of work for 4 years now and won’t even look for a job! He was employed for 3 months last summer and quit his job on the day I went to work at mine – he couldn’t wait to quit it and was just waiting for that opportunity. He promised to find something else but has not put any effort into it at all, when I have managed to stay gainfully employed even in a tough economy and a depressed area. We, too, live below the poverty line and get food stamps (embarrassing!). We need them but my grandfather would have sooner died than let his family be on welfare – he worked his fingers to the bone and supported his loving wife and kids their whole lives. Nowdays, it seems men are like kids and want a woman to care for them. My spouse is verbally abusive, won’t do much around the house and complains when he has to and continually blames me for all our problems. I don’t criticize his faults like in the list above because I’d be screamed and cursed at and called a “sorry b—-” in front of our kids, which is what he has done recently. I am so fed up I’m about to leave with the kids and agree that he doesn’t have to pay child support just to be away from him. I am sure this book is great for marriages that have just lost some “spark” or gone down hill over time but I’m afraid we are a lost cause.

By: Dru Steel

Dru Steel — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 13:55:48 +0000

Thank you for helping me to realize that I am not alone. I will definetly try all recommendations you offered.

By: Monika F.

Monika F. — Sat, 01 Jan 2011 02:13:43 +0000

Oh my goodness, Cinderella, my story is exactly the same like yours except I’ve been married 7 years and have been stay at home 6 years. I was not a professional but had a good job. We have 3 children. My husband refuses to be gainfully employed and wants to only work at commissions based jobs. We live under poverty line, but he won’t give me help with kids or to cooperate for me to find a full time job. Now I got part time job on the weekends, and he has to fend for himself with the children. I should have done this much earlier. Now I will save my money by God’s grace I can build up a little ‘nest’ and if he does not change I’ll have the leverage to leave. All of the advice you outlined from your experience is so true, I wish I had been wiser…..I enjoyed the article too, especially 1. and 2. applies to us so much, and the statement that it takes one person to have a bad marriage but two to have a good one. Good luck to all of us, courage and clear head for future decisions.
Monika