Comments on: Free marriage advice: part 1

By: Melissa brink

Melissa brink — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 04:25:14 +0000

I am so sorry to hear this. I know it seems hard but honestly I think that you should give up if he is willing to give up and leave you for the other woman it is his loss. You can always get child support and stick it to the mAn! Again I am sorry to hear this. His loss

By: Melissa brink

Melissa brink — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 04:22:30 +0000

So me and my husband have been married a year now and we have a six month old son. I work the moving shifts and he works whenever so I always take care of our son. So yesterday was our one year anniversary and we went to the movies and then went to dinner and I paid. I pay all the time. Its not like he doesn’t have money he does. He buys himself car parts but mocks me when I need something. He doesn’t spend any money on our son I am always buying him diapers and I pay all our bills. We argue and I say if you don’t appreciate me one of these days I won’t be here. I have been tempted to leave so many times but I can’t because of our son. He didn’t get me anything for our anniversary. I feel so not appreciated. When we have sex there is no romance at all he just says wanna duck? Then the other day we made out and it was so awkward. It doesn’t happen like ever and when it did it was awkward. I need help!

By: Denice

Denice — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 21:08:51 +0000

I have been with my husband for 14 years married 7, we have 5 kids together one who is only three weeks old, back in July i found out he was texting one of his employees way to much he had been working out of town for three years he told me he was going to sleep and would stay up texting her for 2 hours, he would call her on weekends when he was home with us, text her before bed every night and first thing when he woke up, He said they were just friends and that she was easy to talk to me being pregnant i tried to tell myself to let it go and tried to get over it then in October of 2011 i found on his work cell that he called her He denied it and things went down hill from there, he was back home full time at that point , we would fight he would sleep on the couch for a week then in our bed then back to the couch told me he wasn’t talking to her anymore but i knew he was i caught him at her house, i caught him sitting in her car at one of his job sites finally in November i decided it would be best if he moved out i was hoping by him moving out then we could talk without fighting all the time i asked him for 6 months to work on our marriage, He has openly admitted to being in a relationship with the other woman but then somedays he tells me he misses us and wants his family back. I just want my husband back i don’t want to lose him but lately i feel like he is gone and isn’t ever coming back home, i am here raising a 13, 11, 8, 3, and 3 week old baby just wishing and hoping and praying he will come home to us, but its getting harder knowing he is having sleep overs with the other woman i don’t want to and am not ready to give up on my marriage but i don’t know what else to do i can not afford all the save my marriage books and stuff i find online i just had a baby and have always been a stay at home mom so the only income i have comes from him and it takes every penny to support my kids i just dont know what to do anymore i don’t want to give up hope but i am starting to feel like all hope is gone

By: help wanted

help wanted — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 15:30:02 +0000

Ok so as I have seen in many of these comments is all they have needed was to have their needs heard, well what happens when you have voiced your needs and your wants and desires. I have tried to have a civilized conversation with my husband. I have told him I love him and i want him. I even broke down and told him I needed him in my life. This is the man i would have given anything to be with and have in my life. I dont expect him to read my mind but i do expect him to trust and show trust when he says he does trust. I think alot of his past relationships have really damaged him and i do understand but how to bring him past that and show him that i am not them has been difficult. I dont really know what problem i want to address. I want my husband back, the one I fell in love with, not this man who really does act like he doesnt care. I am so tired of yelling and fighting and whether i want to admit it or not i am very afraid to lose him. I am just to proud to tell him. I feel i will tell him when he realizes that he is afraid to lose me as well. I love my husband with all my heart and I want to fix my marriage.

By: John Rhude

John Rhude — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 17:21:09 +0000

I’m thinking of getting involved with a lady from AL. She had filed Chapter seven in the past and she is now trying to pay some of that old debt off. If we were to get married would I be responsible for that past debt of hers?

By: Ron

Ron — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 02:37:58 +0000

Hi, I love my wife we are married 8 years together for 12 separated for a year. Still living and sleeping in same bed. We have a 4 year old son. We have been on 3 major vacations during our split this year. As well as some nice weekend getaways. We are in counseling for 5 months. Nothing is getting better. I had a recreational drug use which caused the split last October. I have now passed a year clean time. And officially 3 useful 4 years. she can’t move forward we are in limbo for a year. I love her with all my heat and want her back do I quit or keep going it has been one long year what to do

By: larissa

larissa — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 23:38:53 +0000

I was a habitual lier. So off the bat of our relationship I was not hounest. Well we have been 3.5 years and he’s become verbally abusive calling me hurtful names. I’m also affrid he been talking to other females. Some times when I’m doing chores around the house ill pop up and he will start acting really up tight and turn his phone away from me. He will lock hisself in the bathroom for hours with his cell. Our sexlife is normal but he s been really critical of me on everything I don’t know what to do..on top of it all I have a hormonal. Imbalance. So I’ve becomevery forgetfull.

By: Paula

Paula — Sun, 11 Sep 2011 14:26:58 +0000

I have been reading through some of the comments and can relate to alot of them . I have been married for 17 years but he moved out on me about 4 years ago one day while I was at work so I never even knew it until I got home and all his clothes were gone and no note or anything explaining anything. After a few days I finally found him at his parents house. He said that he was no longer in love with me and wanted a divorce. I begged and pleaded for another chance for several days until he finally said that he is going through midlife crisis . After 4 years of living apart, I dont know if I believe that excuse anymore. There have never been any other women even though he claimed that there have been but he recently admitted there havent been any other women.
He refuses to ever go anywhere with me and quitefrequently does go places with his brother who also lives with his parents at age 40. My husband is 42 years old himself. Husband has no income due to a back injury 20 years ago so I am his only source of income . I buy him most everything he asks for each payday and even give him cash each payday but if I ask for anything from him , you would think that I asked him to give up a kidney or something.
Yes, for somew odd reason , I do love him with all my heart and still want him back , but have no clue on howq to get him to come home so that we can be a married couple again like before. We never got divorced 4 years ago because he changed his mind and said that he may want to come home someday .
Can someone out there PLEASE advise me on what to do here. ?

By: Joanna

Joanna — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 00:09:14 +0000

I need serious advice about my marriage and I don’t know where else to go……. my husband and I have been married for 15 months. Ever since we got married our marriage has been very rocky. We argue alot and I think its mainly because we are so much alike. One of the major issues we have always had is him making his family (parents and brothers) his priority. His mom and i already bump heads so it doesnt make situations any more pleasent. He will jump over hoops and go out of his way for his family. He does what he can to please them. I feel like he makes them his priority instead of me. If his parents ask him to do something, he will do it right away. If I ask him to do something, he will do it after the 5th time that I’ve asked him. I feel like he puts me at the bottom of the list and they go right to the top. His family to him is the world. Another problem is that im building resentment towards them because of him.
One situtation that we had a big argument about is that his mother asked him to book a day trip for a church fundraiser. We always attend these events along with his parents. Well, he went ahead and booked it….. right away of course. He then told me the date of the trip and I told him that day was my nephews birthday so we probably wouldn’t be able to attend. He didn’t like my response. I told him to have his mom choose another day so we can go. He said no because it was his moms event and didn’t have a say. So I told him we probably couldn’t attend. He got upset and I told him that I thought a birthday event was priority. He then responded that his parents were more important. I have always told him that he always made me feel like his parents were always more important than me and I think he confirmed it by his comment.
What can do about my situtation? Can I fix it? Is there any hope?
P.S. I thought when we took our wedding vows, thats what it meant…… your wife or husband is first.

By: leslie

leslie — Tue, 19 Jul 2011 18:01:31 +0000

Hello,
I have been married to my husband for 8 months, we’ve been together for nearly 4 years. I feel that I’ve been manipulated the entire time we’ve been together, but I’m trying to leave the past in the past. The problem now is that before we got married I told him that I didn’t want to live in his country (I’ll just say it’s in the Caribbean) because I didn’t think I would be comfortable here and the economy, including the currency, here isn’t very good. I’m from the Caribbean too, but even though the country I’m from is more developed than this one, I wouldn’t be living there either for different reasons. However, he insisted that this would be the best place for us mainly because he wants to inherit his family’s business. So now we’re in his country and I’m unable to find a job. He has a pretty good job and pays all the bills, which is fine but I’ve always been an independent person, now I’m holed up in our house because I don’t have a car either and the public transportation system is terrible. Also, his mom lives on the same street as us a few doors down and she has yet to cut the umbilical cord. She treats us like children, calls everyday, usually more than once and she is the nosiest person I have ever met (no exaggeration). I want to live in Halifax, Nova Scotia where we met in college. We both liked it when we were there, but he hates this idea. I am concerned that we will not be able to spend time together as we should and that I will never be happy here (there are more issues than I’ve mentioned). And if that is the case, I am not going to bring children into this. We both want children very much, but that would be a huge mistake under these circumstances. He seems unwilling to compromise for our marriage and this is yet another sacrifice I’ve made for him. I don’t think I can do this. What should I do?