It’s mid January. It’s freezing. The sun hasn’t been out in weeks. There’s snow and ice everywhere. If I want to keep my hipbones intact, I can’t wear nice shoes outdoors. My skin is dry and itchy. I only ever feel warm if I’m wearing six layers of long underwear.
Spring is nowhere in sight.
I know all about the power of positive thinking, but this is my blog and I can hate stuff if I want to. In no particular order, I hate:
- Drivers who pull into intersections when the light is yellow, with full knowledge that they will not clear the intersection and, thus, will block it for people like me who will soon have a green light.
- Drivers who do not see the need to pull their car over to a curb when they wish to stop and wait for a passenger to get in or out.
- People at the grocery store who block the entire aisle with their bodies and carts while they check every single price for every single bottle of salad dressing.
- People who yell at their kids in public.
- When my husband asks my daughter to pull his finger and she does it. Why can’t she learn that pulling his finger is a very, very bad idea? Why?!
- When my dog drinks out of the toilet, dripping toilet water all over the seat and floor so I get my butt and socks wet the next time I go to the bathroom.
- When the scale does not agree with my assessment of what I think I should weigh.
- When anyone-but particularly my husband-utters the phrase, “Told you so.”
- When my wine does not meet my expectations.
- When I need a piece of aluminum foil only to realize we are completely out of the stuff, but no one wrote it on the list.
- When I berate my husband for using up all of the aluminum foil and for not writing it on the list, buy a new roll at the grocery store, and then realize that we were, in fact, not out of aluminum foil after all. It had just fallen to the floor of the closet and was hidden behind the dog biscuits.
- Getting older.
- Runny noses, especially when I have to wipe one and the one I have to wipe is not my own.
- Ice storms.
- Static electricity.
- When people smoke just outside the door to a restaurant, leaving the door open a crack so the entire restaurant drops to 30 below zero and smells like an ashtray.
- When people can’t decide whether to wait for a restaurant table or not, so they stand in the doorway with it half open, turning my wine into a winesicle.
- When I look all over the house for my car keys, ask my husband if he knows where they are, and hear him say, “In your hand.”
- When my husband eats lentils.
- Potholes.
- Paper cuts.
- Parents who mistake me for a stay-at-home mom and say things like, “I don’t know how anyone could put their kid in daycare. Those daycare kids have so many behavior problems. I don’t know how parents can do that to their children.”
- People who don’t know I’m half Jewish and make comments about “Jewing people down.”
- Banks.
- Grumpy people.
- Anyone who hates me.
What do you hate? Join the hate fest. Get it out of your system. Leave a comment.
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{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
I hate that I feel like a prisoner in my own home because of the snow.
I hate that I got in a car accident a few years ago and rolled into a ditch and have been petrified to drive in the winter ever since.
I hate that in order to go outside, I have to wear nearly every piece of clothing I own to do so.
I hate snow covered roads.
I do, however, love snow days when I have no where else to be
I hate when one white hair sticks straight out of the top of your head no matter what you try to do to it, but you are afraid to take it out, because as my mom says “pluck out one white hair, and ten more will come to the funeral”.
I am laughing OUTLOUD. I loved this! I feel the same way about #9 and #10 has happened to me too!
I hate:
*People who don’t give you the THANK YOU WAVE after you let them pass at a four way stop sign.
*Nose pickers.
*Non-listeners
*People who abuse animals, especially dogs
*When men make more money than women for the same job
Oh and one more – people who can’t get the use of the APOSTROPHE correct – especially on Christmas cards! Learn it people!
I love your list. I agree with every single one of them, except I love lentils. And, Beth, you had some good ones also.
I need to be more specific. I love lentils. I have nothing against them. What I am against is the aftermath, particularly the one that occurs after my husband eats them.
LOVE THIS, ALISA! Good timing, too. Here goes – gettin’ it off my chest!
I hate working out indoors.
I hate when people don’t ‘pick-up’ after their dogs.
I hate when I’m out of wine.
I hate when it’s so freaking cold that the car won’t start.
I hate winter!
I hate when I run out of toilet paper.
I hate when I burn dinner (like I just did!)
I hate living in Indiana from January through March.
I hate it when visitors change the ice dispenser on the refrigerator from crushed to cubed and don’t put it back. It’s my dispenser in my house. Drink your Coke any way you want, but put the ice back to its default position! This is not YOUR house.
I hate watching the Indiana Hoosiers lose 7 straight games. I particularly hate blow outs.
I hate running out of clean underwear.
I hate Fergie. No particular reason. Just random hate.
Oh, I hate outside the door smokers! My kid’s doctors office is across from the children’s hospital. Almost every time we go some parent is out there right past the do not smoke line on the sidewalk with their kid in a wagon hooked up to an IV pole, smoking away. I understand it’s stressful to have a kid in the hospital, and I’d probably want to smoke, too but dang, that’s just too much.
Okay,first off- ditto on the damn aluminum foil.
2-I hate that my husband presents a gift and a curse on the weekends. He ALWAYS serves breakfast in bed, but his eggs are disgusting.
3-I hate when my Mom is talking on her cell while I am driving her around, leaving me having to listen to my music at a whisper
4-I hate that I always have the greatest ideas right before I go to bed, and never remember them in the morning.
5-I hate fake coffee
6-I hate those damn Venus and Serena hair beads circa 1982 on anyone over the age of 3
7-I hate when guys in the grocery store yell “Yo, what’s up shorty?”
8-I hate it when they realize I am way too old to be anybody’s “shorty”
9-I hate that my husband always shreds our credit card statements
10-I hate when people ask me dumb questions
But I LOVE to hear old people cuss in the grocery store. It confirms that they are still somewhat independent and fiesty!
I hate when my man says “Of course I’ll go for a walk with you,” so I wait for him, don’t bother showering and then two hours later he decides its too cold.
I hate when no matter how many blankets I wrap up in at night, my toes are still cold.
I hate clients who think they are the only client I have and call me during my personal time.
Unrelated to my hates… what is “jewing people down?” at least I know I’ve never said it!
Kat: Love you. So the stereotype is that Jews are stingy, which stems from Biblical times when Jews were the bankers (money lenders). At least, I can only assume that’s where it came from. So the phrase “Jewing someone down” is about haggling for a lower price. Believe it or not, I’ve spoken up and said things to certain people, like, “I’m Jewish. Do you think I’m stingy?” They’ve either said, “You’re not really Jewish” which is like WTF?! Or, “You are an exception to the rule.” Anyway, glad you don’t know the phrase. Maybe it is dying out!
Hey, what about the person that sits next to you in the Pub and carries on a conversation with his fancy blinking ear piece cell phone contraption and he yells to make sure they can hear him? Ooh I hate that!
I Hates:
* People that let their kids run all over the doctors office and try to touch my kids with their nasty hands.
* People who let their kids run around ANY store and don’t seem to care to watch where they go cause they are too busy shopping…UGH
* The checkout people at Walgreens that look like they hate the world
* The one person that can’t seem to pee in the toliet in the restrooms at Wal-Mart..We are women we sit down to pee!!
Well i have to say that makes me feel better
I hates:
I agree with your #5 – my husband and daughter do the same thing.
I hate people who are all about drama.
I hate people who are toxic.
I hate the cashier in the grocery store who told me I needed to make time for baking after I selected bakery items in lieu of baking treats from scratch.
I hate not having enough time to do the things I love everyday.
I hate public bathrooms!
I hate being indecisive.
I hate when my mother-in-law makes flippant comments about my parenting because I allow my daughter to watch Saturday morning cartoons for longer than 2 hours.
I hate the nasty slush of the snow.
I hate that I’m the person with a bluetooth looking like an idiot savant.
*I hate people who leave shopping carts in the handicapped spaces. Do these idiots think that handicapped people can get out of their vehicles to move the carts? Are they too stupid to take the cart to the designated area or back to the store front?
*I hate child molesters, they should be given a helicopter ride to the middle of the ocean, no jail, no “rehab”, no last meal, no more tax dollars being spent on these…..I don’t even have a word that describes them…..
*I hate the Porn industry, especially the kiddie porners. The damage that they do to innocent kids is inexcusable.
*I hate, hate, hate having to put on so many clothes, boots, etc. to leave the house in the winter. I’m a sundress and flip-flops girl!
*I hate sitting in traffic wasting gas, creating noxious fumes, knowing that it will take me two hours to get to work on time and that if businesses staggered their hours, none of this would happen.
*I hate that the Exxon Corp posted a $45BILLION profit for the last quarter of 2008, (or maybe it was for the year, but I don’t think so) but has yet to pay ONE CENT of the fines imposed by our government for the Exxon Valdez accident. They have even tried to get the amount lowered! I haven’t purchased their gas in years, and no one else should either.
*I hate that there are thousands of corporations that owe fines and taxes that our government ignores, but you and I could end up bankrupt and in jail for the pittances that we “little people” might owe. (No, I’ve not ever NOT paid my taxes or had “lapses” like Tom Dashle and others in high places) This is why our taxes keep going up- they don’t pay theirs!
*I hate that I’m getting into political issues here in this delightful blog. I’ll stop now.
*I hate it when someone “axes” me a question..it’s ASK, AS then K, please don’t ‘axe’ me! Go watch Sesame Street!
Thanks for providing this “I Hate”…..space! It’s been fun!
Okay, I have quite a few peeves, but my pet one is….
I have lived in both a suburb of Phoenix, AZ and Las Vegas, NV. I love the weather in both places except it does get cold enough in winter in Vegas to occasionally snow. (Not saying it’s a big deal) Anyway, everyone knows about the legendary summer heat of both places, and yet, people from all the cold climates come and live here by choice and have the nerve to bitch about it! What I hate is when some idiot says to me “It’s only 22 degrees, it’s not cold.” and then the same person in the summer says “Ohmygod, it is so hot, what’s wrong with you? How can you stand it?”. C’mon people, there is nothing wrong with ME, it is you that have the problem!! I live where I should, maybe you should try that. Six months of 90+ degrees is cool with me!
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