I will not shower today, and I might not shower tomorrow, either.
I don’t smell. I don’t look dirty or greasy. As far as I’m concerned, I could easily go three or four days without standing underneath that hot stream of water.
Most people shower too much as far as I’m concerned. I used to be one of them. Showering was part of my morning routine. I got up. I brushed my teeth. I showered. I chugged a few cups of coffee. It’s how I turned on my brain.
Then, if I exercised, I showered again.
My slide into the World of the Unshowereds happened gradually. It started once I went freelance and no longer truly needed to leave the house. When one doesn’t need to leave the house, one’s personal care routine can easily move to the bottom of the to-do list. One, for instance, may not realize that one has not yet brushed one’s hair or teeth until a delivery person comes to the door at 3 p.m.
Still, during that time of my life, I probably showered every other day. It wasn’t until I became a mother that my showering routine really dried up. My husband, at that time, was working 12-hour days, 7 days a week. Our daughter had colic and, later, separation anxiety. She cried whenever I put her down. It seemed cruel to put her down just because I wanted to get clean, so I began to experiment with the Art of Not Showering. I began testing just how long I could go before I was In Dire Need of a Shower.
There are five clues that allow me to know whether I am In Dire Need of a Shower. They are:
- I smell.
- My hair looks greasy.
- My skin feels tacky or sticky.
- I look dirty.
- My daughter tells me I smell like the dog.
With much experimentation, I’ve learned that I am only In Dire Need of a Shower once every four days. There are some exceptions to this unshowered rule of thumb, though. They are:
Exception #1: Exercise. If I exercise and it’s summertime, I have to shower that day, even if I just showered the day before. If it’s wintertime, I might be able to get by with a “dry shower” (more on this in a few paragraphs) or no shower at all.
Exception #2: Sex. Even if I don’t think I smell, I always shower before sex because I love my husband and I don’t want him to divorce me.
Exception #3: I’ve been to the salon for a hair cut the day before and my stylist loaded my hair up with gel and spray. Note: You can only go days without showering if you do not wear hair products.
Exception #4: I’m menstruating.
I’ve also determined that there are three different kinds of showers.
Shower Type #1: The Dry Shower. You’re probably not dirty, but you’re a little self conscious about whether or not your dirty meter is functioning properly. Perhaps you just exercised outdoors in the winter. You don’t think you got sweaty, but you are not sure. Perhaps you are getting all dolled up to go out for the evening and you just want to put any fear of smellage out of your mind. That’s when you do the dry shower. You wash your face and take baby wipes to your pits and privates. If you want to make sure you are super dooper spring fresh, you follow up with baby powder.
Shower Type #2: The Speed Shower. This is the type of shower I usually take. You get in the shower, stand just outside the stream of water and lather up your pits, privates and feet. You do not wash your hair or shave.
Shower Type #3: The Spa Shower. This is the full deal. You shampoo and condition your hair. You lather and scrub every inch of your skin. You shave. I generally only take a spa shower once or twice a week.
You might think you could never go a day without showering. You might think that you never would want to go a day without showering. I can only tell you this: you’ll be amazed by what you can get used to. And Not Showering offers many benefits. They include:
- You’ll gain 10 to 20 extra minutes on your unshowered days.
- You’ll save money on your water bill.
- You won’t have to clean your shower stall as often.
- Your hair and skin will look amazing. This is one of the biggest misconceptions about showering. Most people shower too much, which strips hair and skin of moisture-making both look dull. If you really want to look good for a special occasion, shower the day before the event and not the day of. Hair and skin, I’ve found, looks best 48 hours after showering.
How often do you shower? How long have you gone between showers? Post a comment or take our poll.
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{ 27 comments… read them below or add one }
I looked at my man last night and said, “I think I’ll take a shower tomorrow.” He agreed that this might be a good idea.
If I’m going out to meet with clients I shower, but if I’m just working around the house, it seems like a waste to do it every day in the cooler months. I’m a girl, I just don’t get THAT dirty in 24 hours.
A woman after my own heart! I stay at home ALL the time. I often wear the same clothes 3 days in a row so I don’t waste the time or energy having to do laundry. I follow your same shower guidelines unless I’m going out with friends, then I need fresh hair. I also forget to use deodorant half the time. Except when i was pregnant with Josh, I don’t smell. It’s so weird! I don’t even wear perfume, I’m alergic. Wow, from the way I’m talking I sound like I need to go to a Grateful Dead Show he he he…
Not showering has environmental benefits. Did you know tht not showering 1 day a week could save over 665,268,513 gallons of water a year? And if you really just don’t want to shower or have the time, you can use Action Wipes (www.actionwipes.com).
Hysterical! So, so true!
I shower every other day, which coincides with my runs. I basically only shower on days when I run. If I go a couple of days without a run, then I go a couple of days without a shower.
You’re absolutely right about the skin and hair thing. Ditto the sex thing, though. If I am in the mood for love, I will shower!
We bathe the kids every other day, but not always. Sometimes they go a few days. The older one has eczema, so it’s really better that he not stand under hot water on a frequent basis.
Eep! That’s my son’s Simpson’s avatar! I forgot he was logged into his wordpress blog on this computer! I don’t look like that, even if it has been a few days since I’ve showered!
I usually shower every other day. Some days I got 2 days between. Of course, after exercise is an exception. I also don’t (gasp!) bathe my kids every day. It started because my oldest was in a cast for 12 weeks during the first few months of his life. So we only bathed him once a week when we changed his cast. So we never got into the habit of daily baths. It just didn’t make sense to change it. Of course, explosive diapers, major puke, and birthday cake were exceptions!
There’s a fourth type of shower that should be on your list, and this one might make it more enticing to shower frequently: The Sex Shower. I love to shower with my woman, lather her hair, wash her body with a body gel and sponge, and then see where it all leads. I am amazed at the number of couples that pass up this great time to share each other’s bodies. So like the old saying says, “Save water; shower with a friend!”
God, you’re after my heart. I thought I was the only one. Now that I’m unemployed, it’s a week between showers, but I’d really like it to be 3-4 days because I *do* get greasy. I’m thinking of asking for a rent discount because I *know* I’ve saved the landlord a ton of cash (since he’s the one paying the water bill.) It’s the American in us — we think we have to make our bodies squeaky clean, but, it’s just not so. NOW, on the other hand, I worked with a guy who didn’t shower for (well, I don’t know his length between cleanings) but he stunk to high heaven most of the time. That’s the line. Totally. You want to stay home and be dirty? Fine. But Don’t Offend.
what is wrong with you people… hygien is a very important part of life. I bet not one of you are attractive people, and all are over weight.. if your lazy in life, your lazy with everything, including taking a shower.
I never shower
Actually the body is designed to take care of itself. I had this debate with my mom when I was at her house the other day. Here Ill prove my point….
-Think of an animal
Scent is the strongest memory. I am willing to stake that besides the smell of a wet dog you dont recall any odors (feces and urine doesnt count). So why doesnt your pet cat smell horrible?
It all comes down to bacteria. We are for the most part 100% covered in micro-organisms all the time. Even if you shower daily. This is called our flora. When you bath you kill off large amounts of that flora which is rapidly repopulated with whatever organisms are able to spread the fastest. Unfortunately the fastest colonizers are ill smelling bacteria that cause foul odor. We then smell ourselves and think “oh no I need a shower bad”
Whats funny is if we werent to jump to the conclusion that bacteria equal bad we could begin to understand it as a far more complex process of millions of different species competing for the niche that is our dermal surface. We would have a far better understanding of hygiene. Just as in our macro world there are mushrooms and noxious smelling plants there are the micro world equivalent flora which can invade like weeds. The body evolved in a world without cleansing with synthetic chemicals though and is more then equipped to handle this invasion. We have become so dependent on artificial mass extermination of the flori that it takes us a while for our natural defense to kick in.
I have actually completely given up showing. I do not smell and do not have any external buildup of dead skin. My skin is firm and I look great. Heres my alternative cleaning regime.
After waking I enter the shower and spray myself down with a rose petal/pumpkin pie spice/vanilla/green tea extract I make myself.
Before bed I spray down again this using my finger tips to massage the liquid into the skin. After that I apply a thin layer of extra virgin olive oil over my body/face and massage in as well. Do not over apply or youll stain your sheets. I do this about an before bed so it has time to absorb.
I started this a few months ago because I was feeling sick and everytime I showered Id have this dry chemical soaked feeling. I was remembering an article I read about how our bodies are designed to eat a different diet then what were consuming everyday. We evolved as hunter gatherers and the foods these people(our ancestors) ate are what we became designed for. I started thinking of how many artificial synthetic chemicals we use in bathing. If drinking milk and eating junk food was responsible the “big four” heart attacks/strokes etc then what were all these chemicals in shampoo and soap doing to our skin? I pondered how our ancestors would have used aroma for themselves and remembered something about ancient people using flower petals. I went into my garden and took five or six roses that had or were near blossom through them in a pot of water and boiled it into a tea with a lid to trap in any volatile chemicals thatd escape from evaporation. I also through in a little pumpkin pie spice. I then mixed in a TINY amount of pure vanilla extract after it was done boiling and had cooled. Straining the liquid I couldnt help but love the fragrance. I added some organically grown white tea (no sweetener ofcourse) for its antibacterial effects on many species of bad microbes and viruses.
In the end Im very happy I switched over to this natural form of cleaning. It allows my body to maintain a healthy flora/ great skin/ amazing hair/ and the best part an attractive scent consisting of natural aphrodisiac aromas found by science to increase sexual desire in men and women.
If anyone gives this a try write back and tell me how it works for you. Haha since I came up with this I guess we’ll call it the Jet Cleansing Regiment
By the way the reason I spray down in the shower is because the mist dries into purpleish/brownish spots if its not washed away from the surface. The shower is convenient because I can just spray it all out when Im done.
I shower every day, but I only use soap on my underarms, groin, and feet. I’m happy to be using less chemicals. I use about a quarter of the underarm deodorant because I only put it on in the morning and use about half of what I used to.
I’ve gotten into not showering every day or even every other day. Why should I? I’m not leaving the house and too bad if I get sweaty – I live in TX, even with the A/C on, I can get sweaty. I don’t ever smell.
I’ve gone five (5) days without a shower. And most of those days were camping. I was offered a friend’s bathtub (no shower) at day four. No way was I sitting in my own filth. Just wasn’t happening. Mind you, I was washing my face, pits and privates during this time. But when I got home, I must have stayed in the shower a good 45 minutes just to make sure every thing was super clean. LOL!!!
Hubby’s going on a business trip next week – I will only have to shower on the day I see my counselor. LOL!!! I may not shower the rest of the time he’s gone. There truly is no point. The dog nor the cats care if I shower or not. LOL!!!
And I didn’t realize I was saving so much water by not showering. Plus the natural gas to heat the water. And the energy to run the exhaust fan in the bathroom to suck all the steam out. Man, I’m being so environmentally conscious when I’m truly just lazy.
Just a quick comment to Dan. I’m very attractive, per what people tell me. And I’m wearing the same size pants I wore in high school. 2010 will be my 30 year reunion. Not showering does NOT make you unattractive or over weight. Eating crappy processed food makes a person fat.
Hasn’t anyone heard of leaning over the side of the tub to wash your tresses if you’re not showering? I haven’t heard anybody mention that you don’t have to be completely naked to shampoo! I have a shower massage which can be used as a hand held for just such a purpose (as well as rinsing the tub when you clean it). I shampoo three days after the last time and shower about once a week. As for washing up, I do that every morning and evening, especially if I’ve worn make-up. (You’d be surprised how much tension is stored in your face. That warm water splashed on to rinse your lather off feels so relaxing before bedtime. I miss it if I don’t do it.)
First, to this Rob guy, I’m sure you’ve got the best intentions with this sex shower thing. However, sex in the shower usually requires a pre-wash. I don’t know a single woman who will actually let their significant other actually wash them from dirty to clean, especially in the tender zone. So, it’s more like a real shower and then slippery sex.
Anyway, I recently had another baby. Prior to that my youngest just turned 4. With hubby being out of town 3-4 dys a week, I was comfortable occasionally letting my 11 year old watch t.v. with the other two just long enough for me to feel clean. Now, with a newborn, I’m lucky if I do more than wave to the shower while sitting on the pot. Most of the nights when hubby is home, I have every intention of jumping in the shower. Unfortunately, if I make the mistake of sitting or worse, laying in bed for a second, then all the exhaustion I’ve been harbouring while he was away catches up with me. For those of you who don’t know, sleep will ALWAYS trump clean.
It’s funny, because I had been known to shower twice a day in my pre-parent years. Now, if I’m running out with a friend, I warn her that it is her job to watch the little ones while I shower so that we can go out.
It’s so nice to know that I’m not alone:)
God bless you as a mother and doing it alone so often. I had only one child, but I was practically a single mom, myself. When we came home from the hospital, we had no baby supplies because everyone who had offered to throw me a baby shower backed out because they had other friends expecting and didn’t want to slight them. My mom was upset because she gave up gifts she had bought before someone could hold a shower and we had to stop by her house to pick them up on the way home from clear across town! Unlike many other grandmothers, she couldn’t understand why I would want her to come over and help out the first or second week of being home.
So, it all rested on the shoulders of my then husband who resented the whole thing of being needed in that way. It was ironic because my grandma went to each of her daughter’s and daughters-in-law’s homes and helped out each time a baby was brought home. I saw this myself as a child.
You definately don’t expect to be a single mother when you become pregnant in a marriage. My daughter was born in 1975. I commend you for giving your friends the babysitting job while clean up before going out with them. Its a little trade-off and I’m sure they enjoy spending a little time with your baby!
My friend sent me this and I love it. I follow about the same routine, but I generally shower every 7-10 days…however I probably wash my hair about every 4 days. I’m just now switching to baking soda for hair cleaning (as in I’ll start tomorrow morning). If I smell, I’ll shower. If I sweat a lot (which is only after hardcore exercise) I’ll shower. If I feel or look dirty, I’ll shower. But it’s usually only once a week. And I love it. Of course I wash up in between. But I feel way better. And my skin is better. And it’s great.
Also if you look into fit for life type natural hygiene stuff. You’ll never have any bad smelling stuff leave your body, pores or anything. So like doubly not needed !
Especially if you go off what jet said .
i shower and wash my clothes only 3-times ayear and i love it and am very use to it during the summer it does get very interesting when im in the check out lines in all the stores but if they dont like it its just to bad because i can go even longer because i really,really love it…
I’m sittin’ pretty at 8 days RIGHT NOW. This is a new record for me, the previous was 6 days.
“i shower and wash my clothes only 3-times ayear and i love it and am very use to it during the summer it does get very interesting when im in the check out lines in all the stores but if they dont like it its just to bad because i can go even longer because i really,really love it…”
Having a laugh, eh???
:D:D:D:D:D:D:
Wanna bet!!!!!!!
My situation: I am a male, decided not to shower for 2 months.
4 days: I smelled absolutely horrid and this stench could be caught at 10-15ft away by some! I was sick from it myself, but I stuck to my goal.
10 days my stench slowly subsided into wet dog.
13 days: dog subsided into wet pasta.
16 days: pasta turned into earth smell, but by now I had started to think that my nose was just desensitized and so I started to ask people.
Most of my friends are fond of honestly ripping on each other but most just said that I don’t smell like anything. Then I just stopped being self conscious altogether and resumed normal life to a 100% i.e. working out going to parties and even cuddling with people. Been a month and a half now, my skin and hair look really great, but what is most surprising of all is that I have received only positive feedback on my smell. I just make sure I cool off after working out and wipe the sweat away dry-shower style and it works perfect. I don’t know how long it will work for, but this is really weird in a good way.
I haven’t showered for a month and a half, all comments I ever get are about my shining hair and what do I use to style it
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